I’m often asked what does Positive Ageing look like? It all sounds as if surround sound, continual happiness is the goal. In Fairyland maybe..but not in this world!
Leonard Cohen, in one of his songs says something like- “There’s a crack, there’s a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” I tried explaining this to my perfection seeking granddaughter the other day. She listened to my long and winding explanation and sat silently. I decided she must be in awe of my borrowed wisdom and depth. After a moment I asked for her response. ” Must be a granny thing.” Back to the drawing board in explaining life is not perfect…. and that’s OK.
But in this imperfect life, even as we age and we know the outcome of this ageing, how do we live mainly happy, engaged lives?
Positive Ageing is focused on strengths, resilience and opportunities for growth, learning, connection and purpose, rather than defining ageing as a period of decline.
Martin Seligman is a professor of Psychology at the University of Pennsylvania where he developed the PERMA model as an understanding of what contributes to wellbeing.
As he says, ” Positive psychology takes you through the countryside of pleasure and gratification, up into the high country of strength and virtue, and finally to the peaks of lasting fulfilment, meaning and purpose,” Seligman 2002
Countryside? High Country? Peaks of lasting fulfillment? Get on your hiking boots. This is a journey I want to take!
In 2012 Seligman outlined 5 core elements for wellbeing. He uses the word ” Flourish” rather than wellbeing in his book. (Flourish (2011) by Martin Seligman)
He says, “Positive Psychology is not a Happyology.”
Positive psychology and positive ageing are about engagement, purpose, fulfillment and the positive experience/emotion/ connection that results. This is known as the PERMA model.
P- Positive Emotion
Means joy, comfort, happiness. but not necessarily cheerfulness. Seligman’s research shows that there is a strong genetic component to being happy/ cheerful. His estimate is that 50% of your cheerfulness quotient is genetically based. We have about 15% leverage in these cases to change our thinking and the way we age to embrace positive emotion rather than negative affect.
Can we raise the level of our positive emotions?
Yes. One way is the use of Gratitude diaries. Seligman conducted studies where people with low scoring positive emotions were asked to each day write the 3 good things that had gone well. They did this for 6 months. At the end of this time, they were retested for positive affect. (This research was based on random assignment placebo-controlled testing which is the gold standard in behavioural research.) The results showed less depression, less anxiety and greater positive outlook among the group who kept regular gratitude diaries.
E- Engagement
Connection, flow, absorption. When time stops for you. Think of when you read a great book that you don’t want to put down. Your imagination is engaged. You are transported. We talk about pages coming ” alive.” Engagement occurs when you use your signature strengths, such as gratitude, a sense of humour, storytelling ability, insight, patience etc. Think of the artists slow, patient, deliberate act of creating.
R- Positive Relationships
Good relationships are a skill. We can teach people to be better listeners and communicate more effectively. We can help increase their emotional intelligence. Older people are capable of further developing their capacity to connect. The “grumpy old man” may exist, largely as a jokey stereotype but he can be capable of meaningful positive relationships if shown how.
M- Meaning
Human beings have an instinctual need to look for explanations. Sense-making and making meaning from experiences and data. We find meaning in volunteering, mentoring, gardening, the arts and our families. A large number of older adults return to churches they frequented in their childhood, take up yoga or find meaning in alone times. I remember my 80-year-old mother would, every evening in summer, sit in the garden she had created, lost in thought and memories.
A- Accomplishments/ achievements
We flourish when we use or build our mastery and competence. Look at the estimated 15,000 U3A members across Australia meeting together to learn and grow. Creating a garden, walking 10,000 steps, weight-training, writing books, solo travel. Whatever builds a sense of accomplishment serves to help us flourish.
Seligman’s research into how human beings can continually grow and thrive has been adapted and refined over decades. We know a lot about how to live more cheerful, engaged and connected lives as older adults. At Viva70 our focus is living a good life, however we individually define that. Positive Ageing is an open door into how we can indeed live a good life at any age.
” Ageing is not lost youth but a new stage of opportunity and strength.” Betty Freidan